Our baby has grown so much...Jasper has been with us 6 months already!
The Darwin Awards
Here is the glorious winner:
1. When his 38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
And now, the honorable mentions:
2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself.
He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer... $15.
7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.
8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher.. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."
9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan at 5 AM., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.
10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.
Hey Mariah! You're supposed to do all the drinking AFTER you've accepted the award! Check this out...
So in my free time (when is that?), I used to do those Sudoku puzzles which are fun. Then, I came across a new number challenge called Kakuro. You need to sort out which single digits add up to make the number to the left or on top. I.E. "3" always is "1" and "2"...the other catch is that it will never repeat a number in a line. So..."10" over 4 boxes is always 1,2,3 and 4...but never 1,2,2 and 5. Here's a sample from kakuro.com:
What is up with those eyes?
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He's Mr. Heat Miser! Here's the Big Bad Voodoo Daddy's version:
As pet lovers, Jeannie and I were cracking up over the "sleepwalking dog"...
Finally, how to drive in a roundabout!!!
In case you've heard about it but haven't seen it, THIS is the way to enter into your wedding ceremony!
Heatwave
So there's this heatwave in China right now and as a result here is the current version of "World's most crowded swimming pool". Hope they keep the P out of this OOL.
Doctors have concluded that if you find the man in the coffee beans in 3 seconds, the right half of your brain is better developed than most people. If you find the man between 3 seconds and 1 minute, the right half of the brain is developed normally. If you find the man between 1 minute and 3 minutes, then the right half of your brain is functioning slowly and you need to eat more protein. If you have not found the man after 3 minutes, the advice is to look for more of this type of exercise to make that part of the brain stronger!!!
5/27/09 Cruise pictures!
This was the ship as we were docked at the Kings Wharf Dockyard in Bermuda
The main atrium
This was our view out of our balcony...
The gorgeous Horseshoe Bay in Bermuda...
This obviously isn't my photo, but it certainly sets the scene
From atop the famous Gibbs Hill Lighthouse
Hey look! It's my winter home!
This is in the Windows restaurant, named for obvious reasons...
I can't seem to find the picture of the 4 of us at 2am (giggle giggle) but here are WINK Country's Mark Healey and his wife Angela at a reasonable hour...
Jeannie had quite the week...click over to Jean's Blog here to see...
5/26/09 We're back!
So nice to be back with Jeannie on KNE FM. I'll post some Bermuda Cruise pics when I get them all transferred and uploaded. The weather at Dockyard was 75 and partly sunny every day on the island. It was just perfect. Thanks for all of the "welcome back" calls and emails!
5/13/09 Answers....
Jean and I get a lot of great email from listeners. Funny stories, tv talk, comments and causes...well, read this one and see if you can help.
Good Morning Steve,
I am writing asking for help which I am sure you get alot of. However, I am not looking for money or anything materialistic. I am asking for help for my one year old little boy. I have been told that my son is "deaf, blind with a rare seizure disorder. He may never crawl, walk or talk but nobody knows why." Which is an answer I cannot accept. I have contacted as many news stations, talk shows and magazines that I could think of asking them to help me share Cole's story because I know all it takes is one person and it could change Cole's life. But nobody has responded to us. I cannot stop fighting and searching for someone to be Cole's voice. Someone that has a voice people will listen to. I love my son more than anything... but love cannot help him in the way that is needed.
If you could take 4.5 minutes and look at the video on the link below I would so greatly appreciate it. Even if you feel you cannot help us but can find it in your heart to at least pass the video along it would mean the world to us.
I truly thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Check out this nasty bugger that Jean found outside:
5/8/09 Momisms!
We've started on air with the new list of momisms. Call us at 603-355-1037 or 1-800-445-1037. Email option too- steve@wkne.com
So far...
Put some elbow grease into it
Wait until your father gets home
I hope you have a kid just like you some day
I never talked to my mother like that
Wipe that look off of your face
It is what it is
Why? Because I said so- that's why
...Because it's good for you
When things get to the point when you have to either laugh or cry- laugh.
"No" is a complete sentence
Don't make me come over there
If your friends jumped off a bridge would you follow?
If you don't have anything nice to say about someone, don't say anything
What part of NO did you not understand?
I remember when I was a kid I had to walk uphill in a snow storm both ways
Go out and get a stick from the whipping tree and make sure it's a good one otherwise I'm gonna make you go out and get another
That's it- you're grounded for a life time
Tell me the truth- who really did it
If you pick your nose, you will get worms in your belly
There's another person living in this house and his name is NOT ME My high school friend Andy's mom was a hoot. Here's what she said once: You boys be careful out there on that driveway playing ball with all of those pine cones out there, those things have been known to kill people
Here's a great clip for moms everywhere:
5/7/09 Where does the time go?
Hard to believe that my kids are 12 and 9. I still meet listeners who remember the day that Courtney was born back in 97, and when Ryan joined us in 99. Thanks to everyone who asks about my kids! They're the reason I was put on this earth.
Here's the classic "now and then" comparing just 6 years ago with today.
5/5/09 Chuck Wicks is coming soon!
Yes- that Chuck Wicks. Our sister station, 987 WINK Country is bringing the country star to Keene on May 29 at the Colonial Theatre. Good seats are still available at thecolonial.org.
Bethany will be interviewing him this Friday on KNE FM. We'll get his take on being on "Dancing With the Stars" this season. Oh- this show will sell out, so don't wait!
4/30/09
From Hollywood Trash this morning, Catherine Zeta Jones alleged wants to buy the rights to Susan Boyle's story. We asked which celebrity had the best shot of being the Talent Show star on the big screen:
Kathy Bates
Britney Spears
Susan Rattan
Rosie Odonell
and...the big winner was:
Wow. Whattadeal! That Suzuki Motorcycle from Keene Motorsports sold in less than 1 minute Saturday on the dollar saver. We saved someone over 6000 bucks! More great savings online here
4/16/09
Country star and Dancing With The Stars contestant Chuck Wicks is coming to Keene on May 29! More details coming soon. How cool!
Also from today's show...
Here's the video everyone is talking about:
You'll have to click here to watch Susan Boyle surprise everyone on Britain's Got Talent!
4/15/09
Funnyordie.com is actually a very funny site. Former SNL alum Will Ferrell is one of the great minds behind it. As you may or may not know, Lindsay Lohan is single again after taking a break from Samantha Ronson.
Let's go Red Sox! Opening Day is days away. Monday, to be exact. The grass will be greener. The days will get warmer. Finally, spring is really upon us. "Sweet Caroline". Walk off homers. Big wins...agonizing losses. It'll be nice to have our friends back for the next 6 months.
Don't forget, we'll have every game on our sister station 1290 WKBK. You can find a complete schedule here
4/2/09
I hope you've signed up for our Chocolate Emergency Squad. We'll be picking our first winner on Monday and I'll be personally delivering a half empty box of chocolates...okay, fine, I won't take any. Like I said, I'll be personally delivering a full box of chocolates from Ye Goodie Shoppe at the Colony Mill. Be sure to sign up because you could be the MVP of your workplace if I come knocking at your door Monday!
Ye Goodie Shoppe has a great gift idea that gives all year long. Check out the Sweet of the Month club here
3/27/09
Lebron James will be on 60 Minutes this Sunday night. Check out this unbelievable shot...
3/26/09
I don't know why this tickles me so much, but listen around :50 into this clip of Britney's Tuesday night performance. What???
3/24/09
So yesterday morning, Jeannie made me watch this video clip of some lion name Christian. In case you hadn't seen the 40 year old footage, I've posted it below. I then had to show it to Christie and the rest of our clan...it really was pretty nice.
3 more questions for Steve and Jean
How did you get your start in radio?
JEAN: I was a junior in high school when the local radio station ran an ad looking
for a reporter. I was already writing for a weekly newspaper so my mother
called the school and Paul Tarsa the vice principal (who was wicked cute)
got me out of class. Mother told me to apply for the job after school that
day. I did and I got the job on the spot. Never argue with mother.
STEVE: I was a junior in high school too. I just started showing up as an intern, next thing you know, they actually let me on the air. That's only because there literally was NO ONE ELSE available! 20 years later, I think it worked out.
What's the best/worst part of being on the radio?
JEAN:Worst; hours and pay. Best; wanting to go to work every day.
STEVE: Worst; I don't get to send my kids off to school in the morning. Best; I love my job, every day! Plus...I get to pick up my kids from school!
What would be your second choice for a profession?
JEAN:Hmmmmm, maybe ice cream taster.
STEVE: I would have to go to Hollywood and take over Drew Carey's role as host of the Price Is Right.
How about some good news for a change?
WE AGREE!
Be sure to check out our new feature KNE FM GOOD NEWS which will be on around 845. There are so many good things happening out there...and we want to hear your good news too!
Did your kids do something outstanding? Are you pregnant? Are you NOT pregnant?
Everyone always asks Jean about my vacation time. I've been told that I need to post some "Steve Vacation Pictures" ...so here we go.
Who doesn't love cruising? You gotta love your waiter!
Here are Christie and I, with my parents getting ready for a show.
When Jean says "are you going to the Lake House?" this is where I am:
OK....this is one of the most fun things I've ever done. In the picture is Courtney tubing...wicked fun!
Courtney and I at Diana's Bath, a great swim spot in the White Mountains.
We spent Thanksgiving 2007 at the Turks and Caicos Islands. This was a shot from the back of the house. This whole bay was shallow enough so you could walk to the beach.
My face suddenly got younger looking around this time...
And then we took all the kids to Florida and Disney last summer!
Courtney and Ryan back in June 2008. I just love Disney!
Does this picture make my leg look fat?
Of course, when the huge donut came to Springfield, I was there...
...and guys, how happy would you be if your woman took you deep sea fishing on your birthday? Yup, that's a keeper!
